It's a week before the Awaken Prayer Initiative starts on June 1. I opened my Bible to Isaiah and went to 8:11 and started reading there.
8:11 "For the LORD spoke thus to me with his strong hand upon me, and warned me not to walk in the way of this people, saying:"
Father, thank you that you speak to us even still. That the one constant between Isaiah and me is that your voice has spoken to both of us and continues to speak. Thank you that we know your name and are allowed to call on it by the blood of Jesus. I am amazed that your voice is so present.
I want to know when your voice is speaking to me and when your hand is resting on me to get my attention. Please don't be far from me today. Watch over Caroline and Sam and little Charlie - I ask that my sons learn to hear your voice at an early age and have obedient hearts that want to do what their father does.
Warn me when I'm in danger and warn my family. Speak to me throughout the day and help me be present with you today. Set me apart so that I can be a blessing to those around me. Thank you for your never-stopping love.
I love that God still speaks to us and that a voice that we can repeat. I think about the years and years he has chased me down with His voice and His love. I think of where He has brought me to and what he has guarded me from, and it's really amazing how patient he is.
8:12 "'Do not call conspiracy all that his people calls conspiracy, and do not fear what they fear, nor be in dread."
Father there are currents all around me pulling me in every direction. Political news and comedians fill my head when I'm in neutral and I laugh at chaos when I should pray and greive. Forgive me for using the names that those around me use and going along with their narrative. I never stop and ask 'Lord, how should I be praying about this? How do you see this situation? What is on your heart right now?" You have not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and love and a sound mind - please show me what that looks like as it relates to current events.I need to be careful what I let frame the story. Too often I let late-night talk-show hosts and journalists decide how I think about a certain story, and I need to take a pause and ask God what His thoughts are about it and how I should be praying.
It's so easy to think that the battle is remembering to pray throughout the day. It seems that the real battle in my heart is remembering that God is God.
8:13 "But the LORD of hosts, him you shall honor as holy. Let him be your fear and your dread."
Father, be my focus today. Don't let me forget that you are who you are. That you are. That YOU. In every situation today, help me return to the rememberance of YOU. Not it, not this, not me, not him or her - but keep me mindful of how much of YOU there is and how much I need you. I do not consider your awe and power nearly enough - there is more than enough there to worship for all of eternity, and that should be an ever-present realization. In contrast, there is nothing on earth that is worthy of the emotion of fear - in contrast, not being close to you should cause me dread - being out of your will should cause me fear. All the elements we naturally fear are built on being unsafe, insecure, exposed - and that is how I am when I am not near you Father.
8:14 "And he will become a sanctuary and a stone of offense and a rock of stumbling to both houses of Israel, a trap and a snare to the inhabitants of Jerusalem."
Jesus, this is you. This is you written thoughout the history books of scripture. Thank you for the confidence I can have in you, knowing that you are not a last-minute thought or just a helpful bystander in salvation. You were part of the plan from the beginning, and all of history leads up to you and all of history reveals you.
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Tuesday Morning, June 26, 2018 5:12am
8:15 "Many of them will stumble; they will fall and be broken, they will be snared and captured."
Jesus, you bring justice everywhere you go - thank you. Any encounter with you brings down the prideful and raises up the low. Please help me deal with my pride first. You say that every knee will bow and every tongue confess that Jesus is Lord - that will happen one way or the other, so help me delare it now and for the rest of my life.8:16 "Bind up this testimony of warning and seal up God's instruction among my disciples."
Father, help me remember what you've taught me. That's all. Just don't let me forget what you've done and who you are. I confess that I forget so frequently and act like my life is mine to direct wherever I want on my own strength - and it's never been. You have been there from the start - you have sheperded me and fathered me through it all, and I forget the lessons you've taught me and keep imagining I am strong and talented and that is why I am here. I am here because of your goodness and mercy - that needs to be bound up and carried with me wherever I go as a testimony and warning.This is so good for my heart. Reflecting on God's goodness over the years and taking every single verse and asking myself "God, what are you saying to me right now - what should I be praying for?" I feel like I've been given a brand new tool that perfectly fits this need in my heart. It is helping me be still, read scripture, meditate, listen, and pray. What an invaluable gift. Writing it out helps me put words to feelings and articulate the prayer.
8:17 "I will wait for the LORD, who is hiding his face from the descendants of Jacob. I will put my trust in him."
Father, even when you are far away - even when I seem to be abandoned - I will wait for you. I don't know if that is an empty promise or not, but it is what I want. I want to have your faithfulness so bound and packed into my heart, that even when the entire world seems abandoned by you, I can feed on what you have done and your promises. My trust - help me to trust you at all times, regardless of what I feel. You have always been the center of this. Every ability I have to choose you is preceeded by your faithfulness and consistency in choosing me. I will put my trust in you because you have given me absolutely everything.8:18 "Here am I, and the children the LORD has given me. We are signs and symbols in Israel from the LORD Almighty, who dwells on Mount Zion."
Lord, even as I pray this, Sam wakes up and is standing in his crib. You have given me all the life I have - a rich story of your faithfulness that I can share with my children. I beg you that Sam would have a heart like yours and that Charlie would seek after you with all his strength. Be their God. Be the savior of my sons just like you have been my savior. Build a testimony for them that will bless everyone they meet and draw them closer to you.Recently, Sam has figured out how to pull himself up into a standing position, but he hasn't been very good at lowering himself down, so he pulls himself up and then starts crying until we help him down. In the last day or two, he has learned how to go down to his knees from a standing position, which is great, but it also means that that's all he wants to do. Stand, kneel, sit, and repeat. He loves repeating a new-found skill over and over again out of wonder (I imagine) in his ability to do it.
I feel like I am very similar. God teaches me a new lesson and I see it in every story, every situation, everywhere I look. He teaches me a new way to interact with Him, and I just want to do it over and over again with Him out of wonder.
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Wednesday Morning, June 27, 2018 5:16am
8:19: "When someone tells you to consult mediums and spiritists, who whisper and mutter, should not a people inquire of their God? Why consult the dead on behalf of the living?"Father, you are so patient. You lead your people through the same things, generation after generation. I keep trying to find help in all the wrong places and turn to you as a last resort, and that shouldn't be. I want you so present in my life, that when I need help or have joy, it is shared with you first. I want to see what your thoughts are first - even before my thoughts. You have all the answers, you know all the details - any other help or source of wisdom is fragments of you. Wisdom says to go to the source.
8:20 "Consult God's instruction and the testimony of warning. If anyone does not speak according to this word, they have no light of dawn."
You are the source Lord. Anyone else who appears to have the answers only do in as much as they reflect you. You are like the sun every morning.8:21 "Distressed and hungry, they will roam through the land; when they are famished, they will become enraged and, looking upward, will curse their king and their God."
The only source of life is you. You bring peace, you bring satisfaction, you bring a steadiness during difficult times. Without you, all distress and dissatisfaction brings despair and hopelessness.8:22 "Then they will look toward the earth and see only distress and darkness and fearful gloom, and they will be thrust into utter darkness."
Without nearness to you, I am lost. When I look at current events and do not account for your hand, I get depressed and cynical. Help me stay close to you Father. Be present in my daily walk so no detail seems disconnected from your hand.
Thursday Morning, June 28, 2018 8:18am
Isaiah 9:1 "Nevertheless, there will be no more gloom for those who were in distress. In the past he humbled the land of Zebulun and the land of Naphtali, but in the future he will honor Galilee of the nations, by the Way of the Sea, beyond the Jordan -"
You make provision far in advance Father. From the very beginning of time, you set the plan in place for Jesus and announced it to every generation before and to every generation after. No matter how dark it is, you are the light - your light is coming and has come.I love that this is the passage I've stumbled on this week. Isaiah was all but a random choice - more an exercise in "well if I'm looking for things to pray about, it may not matter where I start." Someone once mentioned to me that Isaiah really starts getting good after chapter 40, and I've always kind of just accepted that and I think discounted the earlier parts as less compelling or applicable. But God wrote his story in every single place throughout scripture, and this is a really cool reminder of that.
Isaiah 9:2 "The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of deep darkness a light has dawned."
Thank you that you come to get us. When we wonder really far from you, you always give us hope and a chance (and another and another).
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